April 12th, 2020
I roll over at 5:35am and can’t manage to get back to sleep. After a trip to the restroom and a glass of water, I decide to take a peak at my emails. As I suspected, there’s a bright red 1 notification, but what I wouldn’t suspect is the sender. It was my ex. Let’s call him… John? Yes, the most neutral and inconspicuous name of all names. The email happened to arrive 5 minutes prior. It was as if it woke me up.
John tells me that he recently had a revelation… a realization… an epiphany if you will, about my purpose in his life and what happened between us. There’s a sense of urgency yet casualness to his message. As if to say “I would really appreciate a response but I won’t be pressed if you don’t… but you should”. Anyway, as I’m sure you can guess, John has no choice but to email me since he was blocked on my phone and all social media. For good reason, I might add.
A few days later another old fling goes on a liking rampage on my Instagram and FOLLOWS me. He also insists on sliding in my DM to express how grateful he is that my family and I are doing well after having been sick… *rolls eyes*. This quarantine is making people very bold. I don’t know about you, but when an ex reaches out I always question their motive. Is it truly sincere or ego driven? Really, the answer doesn’t matter ’cause usually by the time they’ve reached back out, I’m mentally on a different level. It’s the same old story, except this time it’s not. I’ve had exes come back but never during a global pandemic.
So What Does It Mean?
I guess there’s a soft spot in me that empathizes with these men. I mean there’s nothing like impending doom to get you reminiscing on what you’ve lost or who matters to you most in life am I right? If your ex has come back around, maybe they realized how much you mean to them and what a big mistake they made… or maybe they’re just a lonely f**k boy/girl. Whatever the reasoning, don’t allow loneliness to drag you down a rabbit hole that almost always ends in regret. An ex is an ex for a reason.
It’s easy to color memories with a rose tint especially when you’re deprived of social interaction and physical touch. Those arguments with John weren’t that bad, right? Wrong. Now, I’m not saying people don’t change and that certain situations shouldn’t be revisited but I think it’s safe to say a global pandemic isn’t exactly the ideal timing.
Can you relate to this edition of Quarantine Diaries? Let’s chat! Comment below your quarantine stories…
As I read your story the first thing I said to myself was that those dudes are just lonely lol I guess being quarantined does give you time to reflect on your past, and maybe they do have some regrets. But if your that important to them now what happen before? Why didn’t they express these feeling of remorse before all this happened. I agree with you, people can change for the better, but is that change in this case because of true guilt or just pandemic desperation. I can definitely relate to this myself, some relationships are just not meant to be rekindled. Another great edition Queen
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I think “pandemic desperation” describes it perfectly lol Thank you Desmond!